A prolegomena to Thanksgiving; an epistemological look at my caloric intake.

 

And why I am thankful to be alive.

On this wonderful day and because more than a few have asked, I thought I would share with all how I consume. I off this accounting as merely an answer to the question of how and to let all of you know how blessed I am and how truly thankful I am that this is a blessing from God as the alternative would be starvation.

 

I need a couple of things to begin:

A can of food which I purchase from Walgreens in one of three flavors, a cup and a syringe.

Today, for Thanksgiving breakfast I chose Vanilla. Just because.

Give the can a good shake, nothing like lumpy vanilla. Yucccky!

Into that cup it goes.

Purging my tube, nothing like stomach fluids flying every where. Sorry, but it’s a fact; I have to be careful as it can be very embarrassing if I’m not careful.

Get a syringe full of substance.

And, into the tube, ready to be pushed into my stomach. This is done slowly for several reasons.

Let the line breath and allow the fluid level to find its way into my stomach via gravity….yup; just need to allow for leveling.

After finishing a can, the cup and syringe gets a cleaning flush.

Time for a juicy dessert if you will. For me this occurrence calls for Grape. Oh yummy. Wish I could taste.

Same procedure, have to purge the air and allow for gravity.

Down the hatch; well, down the tube for me. Then, when done, simply rinse and repeat as needed.

I hope this has in no way has thrown a shadow over your Thanksgiving meal. I just thought it was proper to share with you what I do for not only today but every day in order to keep alive. I am so very thankful really. If the ability and procedures of having a feeding tube were not available, I would have no way of eating and would not be alive. It is important to me to be thankful. I trust you have something in your life to be thankful for as well. 

Random Act of Culture

“On Saturday, October 30, 2010, the Opera Company of Philadelphia brought together over 650 choristers from 28 participating organizations to perform one of the Knight Foundation’s “Random Acts of Culture” at Macy’s in Center City Philadelphia. Accompanied by the Wanamaker Organ - the world’s largest pipe organ - the OCP Chorus and throngs of singers from the community infiltrated the store as shoppers, and burst into a pop-up rendition of the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel’s “Messiah” at 12 noon, to the delight of surprised shoppers.”

Please take a moment out of the craziness of ‘the season’ and ponder the reason. I hope you enjoy…..Hallelujah at Macy’s.

A walk in downtown Tucson this morning:

 

Chicago Store is a ‘must’ stop for any musician.

Just some random views.

Me in the emptiness

always a Church in town

Colors

Looking up

water and trees

There is beauty here, just sometimes unseen.

It still to this day evokes.

 

It was 1968 and I was 13 years old. We were visiting my Uncle in Shreveport Louisiana and the only desire I had was to see this movie. I knew it was a long movie and promised to tell a story unlike any other at that time. I remember talking mom and dad into dropping me off and into the theater I went.

There was a large cutout poster board of the ape with bone just being flung into the air. Models and dioramas of the spaceships in the movie. Funny looking red eye ball things strangely spread through out the lobby and a large black rectangle placed just as you entered the inner doors into the auditorium.  No fooling, movies where grand big events is those days.

I got a coke and a popcorn and into my seat. I began a life long journey into imagination and speculation that Saturday morning. It was to become my favorite movie until the release of Blade Runner. But on that glorious Saturday morning, the world of 2001 seems so far away and so full of excitement. It was so full of hope. I wanted so much to be apart of THAT world; that world of 2001, so long ago now. Funny, it was a horrible year for me in reality; but in that dark theater in 1968; it sure looked amazing to a young boy who wanted to believe.

I purchased and built a model of the PanAm space clipper from the movie. I wish I still had it. It sat on the shelf in the front of our trailer and I looked at it daily for a long, long time from our dinner table. It took me to a lot of places in the universe; only to be startled awake by my mother asking me to pass the salt. Funny how that works!

ODE’ to my Field Notes

 

As some my know

In my pocket it is stowed

It everywhere goes

In it my thoughts sometimes flow.

 

mageThuer's posterous

postings of pictures and thoughts from my htc phone & other stuff

is where I post pictures of amongst other things the travels and travails encountered with my Field Notes!

Here is a wonderful little interlude into the making of:

find out more at http://fieldnotesbrand.com/

Sometimes, silence is best.

October 2010 letter to support group

 

delivered last night to my support group and read by Mindy

Hello Everyone,

As always, I am so happy to see everyone.

I am good in body and strong in faith. All is well and even the stray $500 bills here and there are nothing more than mindless attacks on my sanity. Paid for over 4 years; now become a bill due and owed by me. I must confess that it is merely a game.

I must also tell you it is fun to send in a remittal for an amount which cost the bill collectors more to process that what is needed for them to stay above the profit margin. I love them and I pray for them, but it's a hoot to mess with them. I am so unafraid that it frightens them I think. Ahh, they don't care. Oh well, I am at peace with the Lord about this and I confess my sin of obstinacy.

I have found a placement for my mother. Please pray for me as I am fighting mightily with myself about this decision. My mind knows that I have made the correct decision; however, my heart screams at me and places a burden upon the strings of being an honorable son. It has been hard to let go and place her care into someone else's hands. The struggle is in my mind I know but the sadness of distance is real in my heart. I can only pray that God understands and my dad in heaven will know the job I did and hopefully he will be proud. I owe both of my parents so much, so much that I could ever repay. They loved me and I am so thankful.

Be strong everyone, now more than ever. The world needs us. Yes, we are all so important and needed by the world at this time. Believe me, mankind is desperately in need. They have not come to the reality that we have to face every day, every second. Life is important and worth living! While the world wants to give up; it is important that we shine a light on the value of the struggle. Do not be dismissed. We have value and I refuse to be a non-producer.

Thank you for being my friends and I am so proud to call you a fellow child of God; if that offends, then I recognize you as a fellow human being.

By the way, my youngest grandson has a tooth. That's officially one more that I have. Life is good and strawberry formula is just fine.

It's CIRQUE de BIZARRE

If you are in or near South Pasadena today; drop by and enjoy the talent. AC and others will be there.

What Good Am I?

I am somewhat often brought to tears by both music and wonderful words sung with talent on par with angels in heaven.

Please take a moment and enjoy this sound by Tom Jones of feelings written by Bob Dylan.

the Hovel is this many, today!

It was three years ago that I started this blog. I had been posting to a web site for a while but was looking for a better, faster way to communicate. I decided to start this blog. It was originally just to be a way to get out some news as to how my cancer was progressing and just to amuse myself and spend a little time.

My very first blog post is here.

It quickly turned to being an open letter to my grandchildren. One big long this is who I am, this is what is on my mind, this is important to me; this is just of interest; here is what I told others about me and hello, I love you; all in one place for them to get a chance to know me. That’s why there really isn’t a single theme or linear approach to this blog. There isn’t one.

When one gets older; being know becomes an important thought with respect to one’s on grandchildren.

As I sit here and write this, my mother, your great grand mother fell a few weeks ago and hurt herself. She is being transferred from Villa Campana where she has been recovering and will shortly be placed into a permanent care home. I am unsettled in this; however, I just can no longer extend to her the care and attention she requires. These past several years have taken their toll own both her and me. I want to tell you that I am tired, but I continue, as best I can to honor my mother and father.

Seems like life never takes a break and keeps coming in all its fury. Oh well, with God’s grace, I will endure. Remember, if it does not kill you; it can only make you stronger.

As you (any visitor) go through any post here, know that you are most welcomed. I have meet some amazingly wonderful people via this blog and the internet. You are encouraged to drop me a note, leave a comment and what I most hope for; that you find encouragement to live each and every day to the best of your ability. Just remember, you are opening and envelope and taking out a letter from me to my grandchildren. It’s OK, you are welcome to read along and hopefully enjoy the journey. I pray each and every day they will. I never grow tired of telling them that I love them. I just hope they remember that I was here, that I tried really hard and I want nothing but their happiness.

God Bless you guys. I really enjoy talking to each one of you.