has it really been two years?
Good morning everyone,
I wanted to let you all know that our meeting yet again has served to both enrich my faith and empower my struggle. I thank all of you who were at last nights meeting or who have e-mailed; with smiles and hugs. You are, to me, the most amazing and strong 'face' to what is good about humanity. Each of you have become a better angel unto my heart. God, I love each and everyone of you.
Last night severed as both a Jan/Feb event, which of course started my mind to wonder. It was Feb. of 2007 that I first came to a meeting. I know, I have way to many doctors, a bunch of wonderful nurse and health care providers and a family that is first rate in every way. Yet, it is you wonderful people who apply a salve which no one else provides. It is all of you that I pray for each day on the radiation table. It is all of you who have shared this journey. It is all of you that have made me a better person.
One of the most gratifying feeling I have is meeting new people who have been brought to the group. I hope in some way that you get to have the wonderful experience that I have gotten from this collective of strength and warmth and love that is OUR support group.
I also wanted to say thank you to those who remembered my mother. I will be picking her up this afternoon and bring her back home. The time and insurance has ran its course. Some of you know that I take care of her and she is so much an inspiration for me to live yet each day.
There was a lot of talk around the table last night about what this group is about. What it provides. The nuts and bolts of why we meet once a month and why we participate beyond that according to our dictates. I have decided to share with the group my thoughts. As it is hard for me to talk to you I have decided to include something I wrote a while back. I have not shared this with you guys other than Mindy. I hope and pray it will help answer any questions as to why we are here.
remembering mike herman
Sunday, Dec 30, 2007
when i found out i had cancer i began looking around for a support group. mostly on-line and mostly either general cancer or breast cancer groups where all that were out there.
as i began radiation treatments, there was a flier on the wall at the cancer center that was talking about a head and neck support group. that was closer to what i felt i needed, so i made it a point to contact them and maybe start getting involved. i called the number to get additional information.
i got a recording which was very hard to understand. it was mike. what i could make out was something about his trip to hawaii, however, i was not sure. i left my name and number and over the next few days mike and i played phone tag. we finally got a hold of each other. i remember how upbeat and positive he was and how important he felt attending the next meeting would be for me. his voice was gone really and very hard to make out. i just remember the feeling that if it was important to him, it was important to me.
well, i did attend the next meeting of the support group. only to find out that mike had passed. i remember the tears and the sadness. i also remember introducing myself to the group and the love and support they showed me even at that sad time.
mike, i'm so sorry that i was just a little late in having you be a part of my life. however, you are a part of my life because of what you left behind, for the group, for me and for you. thank you and i just want you to know; i do so appreciate your efforts.
It is because of all of you that I refuse to be shackled by my disease. It is in fact, my higher calling.
Be strong because Cancer sucks.